holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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