Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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