it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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