apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize