Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.