So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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