It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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