Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...

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  (212): Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward... http://tfl.nu/8dba
  Replies (1) Good night (1866) Bad night (1021)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.

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  (314): so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for. http://tfl.nu/ue3g
  Replies (16) Good night (4237) Bad night (1029)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.

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  (440): Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing. http://tfl.nu/x35s
  Replies (51) Good night (10636) Bad night (1676)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  You better have your party panties on Saturday!

  (1-205): View more from Alabama

  Why only Saturday?

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.

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  (205): You better have your party panties on Saturday! (1-205): Why only Saturday? (205): Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri. http://tfl.nu/ifn7
  Replies (26) Good night (4292) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone

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  (281): My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone http://tfl.nu/zfoz
  Replies (8) Good night (8270) Bad night (1206)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.

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  (410): well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed. http://tfl.nu/tir7
  Replies (17) Good night (1304) Bad night (2842)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.

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  (504): ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town. http://tfl.nu/omo7
  Replies (14) Good night (6445) Bad night (1095)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.

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  (202): We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open. http://tfl.nu/2rgi
  Replies (7) Good night (2616) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear

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  (803): at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear http://tfl.nu/8b8t
  Replies (5) Good night (1418) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy

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  (859): You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy http://tfl.nu/yf7q
  Replies (2) Good night (2099) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with

  (509): View more from Washington

  Isn't life beautiful?

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  (360): So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with (509): Isn't life beautiful? http://tfl.nu/f406
  Replies (13) Good night (2165) Bad night (1146)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?

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  (816): Wait. Wine + Crossbow..? http://tfl.nu/8knj
  Replies (6) Good night (1116) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party

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  (310): I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party http://tfl.nu/6q7p
  Replies (2) Good night (1228) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...

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  (775): You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night... http://tfl.nu/sw69
  Replies (3) Good night (485) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??

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  (505): Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday?? http://tfl.nu/i3dw
  Replies (0) Good night (200) Bad night (310)

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