Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.

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(253): I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby. http://tfl.nu/itl7

Replies (9) Good night (684) Bad night (2776)
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(937): View more from Ohio

she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor

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(937): she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor http://tfl.nu/fo1n

Replies (51) Good night (617) Bad night (7444)
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(303): View more from Colorado

she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone

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(303): she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone http://tfl.nu/1ml1

Replies (20) Good night (1133) Bad night (6250)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity

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(717): There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity http://tfl.nu/xz3u

Replies (6) Good night (1925) Bad night (884)
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(360): View more from Washington

He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn

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(360): He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn http://tfl.nu/981u

Replies (6) Good night (2669) Bad night (548)
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(858): View more from California

This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.

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(858): This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars. http://tfl.nu/bno3

Replies (9) Good night (1811) Bad night (613)
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(319): View more from Iowa

Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here

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(319): Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here http://tfl.nu/2efd

Replies (3) Good night (504) Bad night (1062)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.

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(864): Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that. http://tfl.nu/ou7s

Replies (6) Good night (2137) Bad night (545)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.

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(250): By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so. http://tfl.nu/m028

Replies (0) Good night (748) Bad night (289)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....

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(843): Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom..... http://tfl.nu/jt5r

Replies (3) Good night (536) Bad night (361)
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(360): View more from Washington

My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.

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(360): My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be. http://tfl.nu/3ncs

Replies (2) Good night (355) Bad night (447)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...

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(215): Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment... http://tfl.nu/6162

Replies (1) Good night (553) Bad night (266)
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(251): View more from Alabama

My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.

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(251): My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult. http://tfl.nu/4jpl

Replies (0) Good night (674) Bad night (242)
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(602): View more from Arizona

A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway

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(602): A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway http://tfl.nu/aupy

Replies (0) Good night (542) Bad night (271)
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(361): View more from Texas

I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.

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(361): I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek. http://tfl.nu/8l4n

Replies (1) Good night (290) Bad night (395)

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