There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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