so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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