I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
