Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
