I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize