I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
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Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
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direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
He has the fingertips of a God
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