She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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