I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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