i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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