Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I think my moral compass just broke
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize