At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties