I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
