Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
