you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
