I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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