we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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