i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
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