toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
