i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
