Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
