Where is the hickey?
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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