Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize