ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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