So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
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If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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