That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
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How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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