Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize