so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Randomize
