Dual....:-)
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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