Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
