I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
