And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize