big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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