And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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