I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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