pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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