I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
