bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize