How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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