Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
