I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
