considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
