he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
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If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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