The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
