This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize