I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
